Saturday, September 25, 2010

Am I ??

It has been a while since I visited my own blospot..However, every week I have had a topic and the content in my mind that I thought I should definitely share here. Well..what stopped me from blogging.. nothing... nothing..nothing but lack of discipline and a chaotic mind-set. Although I cannot recollect all of those " supposedly interesting and valuable" topics, I have decided to commit myself to get back!! Anyways..

Now this brings in a topic that I have been thinking for quite sometime now. "Discipline". Have I been this bad since childhood? Is it just that I am just trying to get adjusted to a new place? No.I have not been great for quite sometime - during my grad school since after qualifiers.

Well, back in India, we all (used to, atleast) go to bed and sleep at the same time, whatever time it may be. Even eating habits were n't that bad. Although I prefer to have an early dinner like Americans these days, I was not too bad with keeping up with the dinner timing back at home. And here, what happened to me?? Why and how in grad. school did I gradually loose everything. The enormous freedom, personal time and space that I enjoy- how come I could never use them to mend myself? This is the question I have been asking for quite time. How come I never thought.. well I thought but did not prioritize discipline...I remember a statement that a friend told me "you can bring anything into a routine if you can manage to do that forcefully for 30 days"- May be..May be not..Doing some experimentation by practicing small things. Will let you know if I can make it work.

I have always been easy on me as well as on others in this regard but I can see that I am getting reallly really mad at people for a lot of things.. I am not easy on myself as well.  And, I cannot stop wondering how important it is to have a routine and how that helps you especially when you are put into a stressful or chaotic situation. On the other hand,  I have learned to admire the discipline in others. May be I am just getting old :)

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